If You Have Had an Abortion

A Catholic Path to Mercy, Healing, and Restoration

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If you are considering abortion.

First: You Are Not Alone

If you have had an abortion, you may carry emotions that are difficult to name.

You may feel:

•   Grief

•   Guilt

•   Regret

•   Numbness

•   Shame

•   Anger

•   Confusion

•   Or nothing at all

Every response is different.

What matters is this: You are not outside the mercy of God. You are not beyond healing.

The Church Knows This Is a Wound

When the Church speaks to those who have lived through abortion, she does not begin with politics or condemnation.

She knows that abortion often leaves:

•   Deep interior wounds

•   Unspoken grief

•   Isolation

•   A loss that has no public name

Many suffer silently for years.

Here, the Church speaks as a mother—to call the wounded home.

Truth and Mercy Belong Together

The Church teaches clearly that abortion is a grave moral evil. She also teaches—just as clearly—that no sin is greater than God’s mercy.

These truths do not compete.

•   Truth names the wound

•   Mercy heals it

To deny the truth would leave the wound untreated. To deny mercy would leave the wound hopeless.

If You Carry Guilt or Shame

Guilt reflects a conscience still alive. Toxic shame, however, whispers a deeper lie: “I am unforgivable.”

That lie does not come from God.

Christ does not meet the wounded with contempt. He meets them with truth, mercy, and the power to restore dignity.

The Sacrament of Confession Is a Place of Freedom

If you have not yet brought this to confession, you may feel:

•   Afraid

•   Embarrassed

•   Unworthy

•   Unsure how to speak about it

Please know this:

Confession is not a courtroom. It is a place of mercy.

Through confession:

•   Sin is forgiven

•   Guilt is lifted

•   Grace is restored

•   The soul is reconciled to God

You will not shock a priest. You will not be rejected.

Forgiveness Is Real — Even If Healing Takes Time

Forgiveness does not always erase pain immediately.

Healing often unfolds gradually:

•   By naming the loss

•   By allowing grief

•   By placing the past in God’s hands

•   By refusing to let shame define the future

Healing does not mean forgetting. It means being restored without being imprisoned by the past.

Grief After Abortion Is Real and Valid

Many people are never told they are allowed to grieve.

But loss is loss.

You may grieve:

•   The child

•   The life that might have been

•   The person you were before

•   The choice you wish had been different

Grief does not contradict forgiveness. It often accompanies it.

The Child You Lost to Abortion Deserves Dignity

For many, one of the deepest wounds after abortion is that the child was never acknowledged as a real person.

Silence can intensify grief.

The Church teaches that every human life has dignity — even when that life was lost through sin or violence. That dignity does not disappear because the circumstances were painful or confusing.

Honoring the child does not reopen condemnation. It allows truth and love to meet where healing is needed.

A Gentle Invitation to Prayer

Many people find healing by prayerfully entrusting their child to God in a more personal way.

Here is a way you might proceed:

“Holy Spirit, You know the child I lost. Help me entrust this child to God’s mercy.”

Many people feel moved to ask God to reveal:

•   The child’s sex

•   A name by which the child may be entrusted to God

The Importance of Not Doing This Alone

Because this prayer can touch deep grief, it is often best done with accompaniment, rather than in isolation.

Many find it especially healing to explore this step:

•   In spiritual direction

•   With a trusted priest

•   Within the context of a Rachel’s Vineyard retreat

These retreats are designed to:

•   Provide a safe and prayerful environment

•   Help participants name grief honestly

•   Restore dignity without judgment

•   Offer pastoral and sacramental support

A retreat setting can provide:

•   Discernment

•   Guidance

•   Emotional and spiritual safety

•   Freedom from pressure or self-direction

You do not have to carry this alone.

Entrusting the Child to God

You may choose to speak words such as:

“Lord, I place this child into Your loving hands. I trust You to care for what I could not. Receive this child into Your mercy and peace.”

You Are Allowed to Hope Again

God does not forgive reluctantly.

Your life still has meaning. Your future is not closed. Your heart can still bear fruit.

Your past is not stronger than God’s mercy.

A Line Worth Remembering

God does not erase your story— He redeems it.

A Prayer for Mercy and Healing

Lord God, You see the wounds I carry, even the ones I struggle to name. I place my past in Your mercy and my future in Your hands. Heal what has been broken, forgive what weighs on my heart, and restore hope where it feels lost. Teach me to trust Your love again. Amen.

A Final Pastoral Word

The Church does not say, “Go away.” She says, “Come home.”

Nothing in your past places you outside the reach of grace.

You are still loved. You are still called. You are still capable of holiness.

Resources

Find out about a Rachel’s Vineyard Retreat: www.project-aurora.org

Go to the Sacrament of Reconciliation with your local priest: MassTimes.org – This site also lists confession times.